Our Fears and Actual Life

Fears.

The huge and constant barrier of our day to day lives.

In most cases, it is about us, not the environment.

Childhood

Growing up, I was always afraid of animals. Not just dogs or cats. Almost all types of animals. I was chased by dogs, cats, geese, roosters and many more animals. One of the many reasons for me being afraid of them was that I was a relatively shy kid and I was small and not that strong.

In time, I grew up and got bigger and stronger. My fear of them became less and less. But I was still trying not to get too close to them. It is not that easy to overcome fears of childhood. In many cases, it may even be next to impossible. I did not give in.

First, I felt better and easier around geese and roosters as I was a teenager. I was slightly afraid of cats, since they were extremely quick and I was afraid of dogs very much.

About the cities I grew up in

If you know Eastern Turkey, the cities, thus the people are quite poor. That makes the stray animals not to have enough food. Also in winter, it would become even harder for them to find food. Think about winters lasting about 6 months every year. Snow usually started at the end of September and stayed in until mid April. Even in May, I remember seeing some small pieces of snow on the shady corners of walls in my hometown Ağrı.

This situation made the animals, especially the dogs, a lot more dangerous. I still remember my childhood in Van. Several times during the winter, I would go through knee deep snow and around houses just to stay away from the Main Street and away from the dogs blocking it. Dogs on the streets were usually hunting together.

I would really struggle to go through the snow but it would be a safer choice for me to take. The other option would be to take the Main Street to walk but a bark of a dog would make me run the opposite direction in a second. And keep in mind that all the roads were icy almost during the whole winter.

University time

As I started studying at the university, I saw a lot of cats in our campus. That helped quite a lot. Then one day, I was in San Francisco Airport and my friend came to pick me up with his car. After I sat in, a very young and energetic dog jumped from my back towards me. I started for a moment but then got my composure. Then something interesting happened. The dog also drew back. He was afraid of me in a way. This made me understand that they also have feelings like fear and rejection and more. So, I started to become a bit more relaxed and this made the dog more relaxed as well. A couple of times, he woke me up in the morning. This was also quite new to me. As I got used to his behaviour, I became a lot easy around him. The remainder of my trip and in my other experiences with dogs, I was much more easy with them.

And now

Now, I am in Abisko, Sweden and I met some Siberian Huskies. The huskies used to run dog sleds. Some of them were quite young and I was able to have fun with them including caressing them and taking photos. Some even jumped up to show their affection. A Swedish guy showed me a photo with the husky’s huge tongue on his face. He said that this was the level I need to go, if I wanted to claim that I have seen and been in contact with huskies. I do not think I’ll ever be like that. But that’s me. Apart from that, I am quite at ease with the animals now.

Final words

Overcoming one’s fears is not an easy task. Especially if the fear is from our childhood. However, letting that fear define us is also dependent on us. We can let that fear define our life or try to overcome it, one step at a time, though. Maybe not for all fears, this may work. I totally understand that. But trying does not hurt, I reckon. Especially when one is careful.